I've been blogging for more than four years already and still I have so many ups and downs just like any other blogger. Before, I used to write as passionately as I can with so many thoughts and ideas in mind. However, as time goes by, such passion slowly wanes. I did not actually lost the passion to write, I am just quite desperate because little by little, opportunities gone. Unlike before, I seldom received writing opportunities from DA's and review sites now. I honestly envied those bloggers who got handful of writing tasks. They even hired ghost writer to finish numerous tasks on time. The more they brag about it, the more desperate I become and the more I questioned my writing skills.

Then, as if answering such inevitable question that keeps on haunting me, I stumbled upon this post from a certain blogger- Falling into the trap of comparison. When I read the post, I found myself guilty somehow. Now I realized the source of my frustration, I used to compare my blog with others which should not be done by me. The author stressed on his blog that comparing is not fair. Of course it's true! Bloggers have different skills, have different sources of inspiration and one should stick to it instead of comparing with others.

Realizing it all leads me to one decision: I should stop comparing my blog. From now on, I should write not because I need to, I will write because I want to. I will speak my heart and mind out. I should not be envious anymore with my co-bloggers. If opportunities won't come, ACCEPT, if it does, I will be more than glad BUT I should not allow myself to be desperate anymore because no one notices my blog. I should be writing willingly and straight from the heart.

If you want to read the post that I am referring to, click here. :)

A common policy in most universities. Students have no excuse, not unless with approved note from the SAW Office. Anyway, I wonder if such policy should be imposed to teachers as well. Oops, I might caught myself standing outside the gate waiting for a go signal from the guard that I can enter the school premises LOL. Well, it may sound unfair, but teacher can freely get inside the campus with their casual outfit, something that they felt comfortable wearing (I can hear the students shouting: That's unfair!). For myself, I have a valid excuse (that's what I thought of). I wasn't able to wear my school uniform since June because I am pregnant, then I gave birth and I have this post-partum belly which make it difficult for me to fit on my uniform. But that was two months ago. So, this morning, first Monday of the month, i tried to fit my uniform and alas, it did! Though the zipper is more than half-way (won't close totally) but at least I can already wear it! Most of my students were really surprised. Now, I won't be late anymore finding and thinking what to wear everyday for school. ^_^

It has been three weeks that we failed to go to church. We didn't do it deliberately, there are just some situations that are beyond our control but still we know that there should be no excuse in prioritizing God above anything or anyone else. Human weakness.

So this morning, Hubby and I finally made it tagging along our two babies. Our Pastor's sermon was a real hit for both of us. Somehow we are very much guilty when talking about spiritual decline. I admit it, the longer I lost connection with the church, the more problematic I become and I can feel spiritual dryness overtaking me. Our Pastor discussed the symptoms of spiritual decline: These are symptoms of hypocrisy, idolatry, prayerlessness, busyness AND worldliness. 

Hypocrisy. I might say that in one way or another I became a hypocrite in the sense that I pretend to be a "God-fearing individual" yet often forget to pray everyday, to read the Bible and ironically, I have more time reading my Reader's Digest book than opening my Bible, I just rely on the Bible apps on my phone but still even failed to open it because I have more game apps that consume most of my idle time.

Idolatry. Did I mention that I have more time reading books that my Bible? It might be considered as idolatry because I just can't stop myself from leaping through pages of my very thick, hardbound collection.

Prayerlessness. How I wish I could be as prayerful as David. I often caught myself praying but most of the time it is a self-centered prayer, AND when I didn't have the answer I questioned God. But really, I prayed but not as focused and not as genuine as the saints and Pastors. I know there is something in my heart that hinders God from answering my prayer. And what surprised me this morning is that our Pastor mentioned that God will not hear the prayers of the wicked which made me ask my self if I am really that wicked already. Sigh.

Busyness. Yes, I have all the reasons why I wasn't able to do this and that (church ministry) because I thought to myself that I am too busy with my job and with my babies that I do not have the luxury of time to do anything else. BUT I knew it was wrong. I was WRONG.

Worldliness. I think it might not be that much but still my attention is easily caught by worldly things than the spiritual one. Try to consider my desperation to get more money through online jobs. I often sleep late spending so much time in the computer trying to hunt for online jobs. Silly me but that is true. I am so desperate that I forgot to completely trust God for my security... I am so desperate to have financial breakthrough. My intentions are pure but I am just too hasty that I try to push myself to the limit without waiting for God's plan for me. The result, online opportunities are so scarce nowadays.

I AM SO GUILTY. I am guilty of having spiritual dryness.

I thank God that He is such a loving and forgiving God. 

And oour finale song this morning...

♪ A pure heart, that's what I long for...♫

Yes, Lord. Purify my heart. Renew my mind, my strength and my trust and faith in You.

on piZap.com

My hands are full both at work and at home. However, I still manage to do things that allow me to get rid of boredom. Among my favorite past time are reading and doodling/sketching (aside from sleeping and eating of course). I only knew the basic of sketching but am not an artist at all. I actually do not know how to apply color to make my work attractive thus I better leave it in pencil than damaging the entire drawing. I am not an artist but I love arts! It's one of my favorite subject. I tried once in charcoal rendering but like what I have said, I am only good in sketching because by the time I applied the shades, it was a total mess! But am not closing my doors in possibility of gaining knowledge in the do's and don'ts of color rendering. Nevertheless, I am still very much thankful to God that He gave me eyes that could appreciate arts and a pair of hands that can somehow partake on them. Oh ARTS, I long to learn more about you in the right time.

Miley Cyrus

Hey, do you still remember Hannah Montana? I'm sure your little kiddo does. She's so pretty, responsible, adorable, sweet and wholesome, isn't it? That is why many li'l girls just love watching her every day. Such TV series earned awards not just once but many many times. Indeed, the lead character, Miley Cyrus, never failed to wow her followers. But after its season finale in 2011, what happened to Hannah Montana? Do you miss her? Maybe, if you haven't got the latest update yet about Miley Cyrus, you would probably say YES. But with the latest MTV VMA event, I can only conclude one thing: HANNAH MONTANA IS DEAD!

Indeed, LIFE is WHAT you make it

image courtesy of inquirer.net

Are you still confused about the famous Philippines' Kasambahay Law? This might not be the trending topic right now (can't beat Napoles' surrender)but allow me to share this law for reference purposes.

I am happy for all domestic workers that finally they can now enjoy what other employees have enjoyed (though not all). With the implementation of RA 10361, all 'kasambahay' can already avail the benefits that are due to them such as 13th month pay, SSS contributions as well as PAG-IBIG and PhilHealth. Also stipulated on the law on top of those payments, 'kasambahay's are also entitled  of daily and weekly rest period (a maximum of 10 hours per day) leave benefits and a monthly wage of not less than P1,500.00 depending on the location.

However, despite all those benefits provided for in the said law, there are still 'kasambahay' who are unlucky enough not to receive such benefits. Why? Because some employers can't afford to do so. I mean, there are employers who are just a minimum wage earner but somehow compelled to hire a 'kasambahay' because they have no other choice. On the other hand, 'kasambahay' are compelled to stay with their current "minimum wage earner" employer because they have nowhere to run to or perhaps both employer and the 'kasambahay' have an internal agreement going on prior to the implementation of RA 10361 (I am just guessing, though). 

Ironically, not all employers have an SSS, PAG-IBIG and PhilHealth benefits. Consider those self-employed employer. Most of them failed to contribute to the said social benefits for some reasons and it would be ironic that they will be obliged to contribute for someone when they don't have a contribution on their own. I can relate to that. As part-time Instructor, the University where I am currently teaching consider that "No employer-employee" relationship, thus they are not subsidizing for our social benefits premium payments. I used to contribute for SSS before when I am still working in a private companies but failed to continue. I also have PhilHealth and PAG-IBIG contributions but just like SSS, I failed to continue paying for them. However, after getting pregnant on my first baby, I reactivated my PhilHealth account but failed to reactivate my SSS that is why I never received any maternity benefits at all. Well, it's my fault. Premium payments for these social benefits will cost the employee more or less P600.00 a month (that's too much for a minimum wage earner like me). That is the very reason why my  husband and I agreed that he will stop working for the sake of our two babies because we cannot afford to pay a baby sitter with our minimum income(Well, I guess they are also a part of that Kasambahay Law). ^_^

Anyway, if you have more questions about Kasambahay Law, click here.